A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewelry. Me and my husband found them all so hilarious at our brunch with our best friends! You can by using our one-liner randomizer. What is sometimes hard, sometimes soft and combines with crumpet to give pleasure? The follow up line can be the same or different as the builder wishes. The mosquito stops sucking when you smack it. Are you looking for the funniest one-liner ever? What is the similarity between a woman and laxative? The most devastating force in the world is gossip. Some are crude, tasteless and sexist. You learned them and then you repeated them over and over again to your friends on the playground.
When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose. Are you a fan of famous quotes, funny one-liners, cute sayings, english proverbs or just plain silly short jokes? They keep stepping on the strings. Edit: if it's not clear enough. About One-Liners Ram Dass has always been a master of the one-liner. There are skid marks in front of the dog. Then this is the place for you! One day as I came home early from work …. Two, one to change the bulb and one to hold the penis, I mean ladder.
Are they afraid someone will clean them? Why did the man cross the road? Q: What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Once a speak string is set on an object it doesn't change. Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilise one egg? Why do men name their penises? We have more jokes for you, click on big red button below. The older they are, the easier they are to pick up! The difference between the up- and down-votes will be shown in the big box on the left of the vote-box. He did it like 5 times before anyone ever said anything about it. Why does the bride always wear white? When you take it off you wonder where her tits went. I just find him endlessly hilarious.
Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony? Who is the most popular girl at the nudist colony? Well, I am 100% sure you did. You only need a parachute to skydive twice. Men are like a fine cheese. If the thumb remains red, you voted down. What do you call a woman playing pool whilst balancing two pints of lager on her head? They like the part where the hooker gives the money back.
The problem is no one runs in your family. Then tell him to pick only one. We are looking for all sorts of one-liners, quotes, sayings, proverbs, jokes and even puns, T-shirt one-liners and bumper stickers. Majority of our images are user-submitted and we cannot confirm their source. Warning: some of them are quite crude. Man who run in front of car get tired. Good ones are always taken.
At this point, though, it seems like those times are basically accidents. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown, too? A Navel Confucious he say… Man who drop watch in toilet have shitty time. I chose not to do this to maximize the versatility and ease of use of the script, but using this technique you can then delete the top conversation node and just use script 1. A battery has a positive side. A mosquito stops sucking when you smack it. ~ Miss Piggy All reports are in.
By looking over your shoulder. Or maybe you want to get in touch for a partenership. What do you say to a woman with no arms and no legs? The three words most hated by men during sex? Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. Let us know what is on your mind. By default the spoken line is determined by a 1d10 roll. His commitment to the punch line had you in awe.
. A train station is where a train stops. One — he just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? To stop the snoring before it starts. His lines continue to be my favorite, though it's a bit different because he repeatedly uses them. By clicking on the thumbs-up button you can indicate that you find a particular quote funny, good or that you just like the one-liner.
If you have the feeling our database is missing some good material you are welcome to send it to us with the. Because their balls fall over their asshole and they vapor-lock. What is the definition of making love? Now it is only up to you to make the difference between the bad ones and the good ones! The only reason anyone knows what this is is that Artie recognized his voice one day and asked him about it. I sit and look at it for hours. Bob How many animals can you fit in a pair of stockings? If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation? This conversation can be added to any object. Simon is my newfound hero. Apparently, so is reading comprehension.